Category: Steph’s Lounge

Hey people! Let’s get enlightened with this fun but life-saving post LOL!

When you find “someone special” and it seems everything is going right, there are obviously many traits you’d like about him/her that would make you want to stay forever, but what’s that one big thing that would make you walk away? What is your biggest turn-off in the opposite sex?

Share your opinion!

Still on the fight for justice. God bless everyone who has, in one way or the other, built a system that would get our voices heard. The #Aluu4 tweet-a-thon has made its impact on twitter and other social networks today. God bless Okechukwu Ofili for that movement online.

And MI, the incredible MI has given words and a song to our collective pain concerning the deaths of those young men – Chidiaka, Tekena, Ugonna, and Lloyd. In a track he just released titled ashes, MI struggles with the pain of accepting this tragedy amongst us. I listened to the song and I am reminded of how distraught I was for weeks when it happened. How I would stay awake unable to sleep, how I continued to put myself in their shoes to feel their pain – how vicious and confusing it all must have been for them! One minute they were laughing and alive, the next minute they were looking into the eyes of their murderers!

It cannot go away! The pain refuses to go away until something is done so that we can be free of this inhumanity! God bless you, MI! Always different, always true to what is right, forever a star!

Here’s the link to MI’s site: http://miabaga.com/p/ashes/ and below are the lyrics to the song…

Lyrics.

We were down a sandy beach,
All night talking to your mouth’s words.
Tell me where you would like to be.
Tonight don’t be afraid to dream.
Lean on the fire for a while.
Cause in the morning it’ll all just be ashes on the ground

Instead it be them, let it be me.
Since I will die inevitably,
Then let it be, that it be said
When I am dead: some other was free, some other was fed
Some other, not me, was able to see
That long as we live inside a country where no one is safe,
No one is safe.
We only evade, try to escape
The imminent doom
But closer the date looms.
It comes for all.
If we must go, then at least,
When we fall…

When we’re all ashes…
If I am slain, let them forever remember the name
Some other should gain.

When we’re all ashes…
Because of my pain. Because of my tears because of my scars
Some other should gain.

When we’re all ashes…
The reason I’m gone. Let it be told, let it be known, and turned into song

When we’re all ashes…
If I die alone. Let it be more than dying alone, the reason I’m gone.
The reason I’m gone.

Instead it be sleep.
Let it be hate, let it degrade.
Let it be deep.
Some other should weep
Some other should keep
The memory of
The way that I died
Maybe a change, some other can try

At least we can lie. At least we can hope
At least we can say
tomorrow is better, it wont be today
Some other can pray
Some other can fight
The wrong done to me some other can right.
Then maybe my death can save some other life
For then I would gladly give another life

When we’re all ashes…
Let it be worth
Let it be so some other can live. Let it be birth.

When we’re all ashes…
As I am hurt
As I pass, let it be last, let it be first

When we’re all ashes…
Don’t let them forget
The only regret is that we relent. We all should repent..

When we’re all ashes…
If I die alone,
Let it be more than dying alone. The reason I’m gone
The reason I’m gone

Feels like I stood there watching,
the pain the brutal torture
And added my silence to the violent screams
Of: Burn and torch em.
How do you earn misfortune?
Or does it come unbidden?
If life’s a painted portrait,
Who puts dark colors in them?
If there’s a God in heaven,
Surely he’s weeping now.
As all the blood is shedding
As all His people drown.

God help us all.

Rest in peace Chidi.
Rest in peace Lloyd
Rest in Peace Tekena
Rest in Peace Ugonna

Rest in peace to the Students murdered in Adamawa state.

Rest in peace to those two young girls.

 

I have been in shock since the news broke about the four young students slaughtered like chickens in a community called Aluu.

At what point did we lose compassion for our fellow human beings? Death is assured for every life eventually, but no one deserves to die like those young men died – no one! Death dishonoured them. Even in justice there should be civility and modesty. That is why we are humans, and not beasts grovelling in the jungle. That is why we are made in God’s likeness so that we can be like Him – kind, merciful and fair.

Ugonna, Lloyd, Tekana, Chidiaka were young men with dreams and aspirations; Lloyd was already on his way to becoming a rap artiste; who knows what else these men had dreamed up for their future? But with many swipes from heavy metals and planks their dreams were slayed. It is the most gruesome act I have ever seen and I am afraid how this action reveals the true state and sentiments of many Nigerians.

Why do we permit jungle justice? Do we feel helpless with the system thus take justice into our own hands? What are our fears? What would ever justify the actions of a community that stole the lives of students who lived amongst them – lives that only God can give?

We may never know the truth of what really led to the killings at Aluu – that truth died with the four of them. All we can ask is for justice.That is the only way the tears of the mothers of these young lives may dry. It is the only way we all can feel safe because no matter the situation, lives should not be snatched so brutally. This is a society with laws.

As we seek for what is right, let death not procure more deaths. We do not need to burn down Aluu community. We do not need to shed more blood. Not every child, mother and father in the community killed or endorsed the killing of the young men. They too deserve to be protected from the brutality that has ensued from all of this.

Life is a beautiful thing; do not steal another’s opportunity to experience it.

May their deaths not be in vain.

It turned out that a surprise party was arranged, spearheaded by my wonderful husband (heehee!). It was so beautiful because I wasn’t expecting anything, except a night out with him. So when I saw people arriving with gifts and merriment I was elated. Like everything else that he does, it was perfect! *Thank you, darling*

I am eternally grateful to my loved ones! And like I said at the very beginning of the new month – let’s all keep our minds busy on all that is pure, true, noble, admirable, excellent, lovely, and praiseworthy!

Thank you all for sharing in my joy. Thank you for all your wonderful comments on twitter, facebook, and on this blog. May you find the peace that surpasses all understanding!

And for all the people who made out time to celebrate with me yesterday – you are loved, you are appreciated. God will reward you in His abundance!

God bless!

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–          Stephanie

Like fresh dew drops of a new day

My life is renewed today

I am a year older

I am joyful

I am flushed by God’s grace

I feel so blessed

My soul is delighted

I will celebrate His goodness

And the break of a glorious day

This day that I was born!

My future is resplendent

I am here – God’s child!

The first time I read Eko Dialogue I knew I had to meet the author. Joy Isi Bewaji is an amazing writer, very witty and smart with words. Eko Dialogue is one of those pert books that gives you a real connection with Eko (Lagos). Joy explores the many voices that boom through this lovable but chaotic environment. When you read it, you can hear and smell Lagos through her detailed description of the metropolis. She’s the content manager/editor of my fabulous blog (heehee!) and we have a great working relationship and have been friends for a couple of years now.

Eko Dialogue is a collection of short stories, and the shortest story(actually an anecdote) threw me off my chair!

It is titled “Frustration-in-law”:

A father-in-law’s list of requirements to his son-in-law to be…

3 bags of rice. 3 bags of salt. 2 healthy cows. 1 pigeon. 5 white cowries. One feather from the bum of a penguin. An elephant trunk. The tail of a zebra. A fang of a crocodile. A scoop of sand from the river bank of Mississippi. A box of assorted lace material. One needle. 6 gallons of palm oil. One crab. One tortoise. A box of chocolate. A drum of diesel. 50 litres of kerosene. N5,000 MTN voucher. Educational funding for two of wife-to-be’s younger siblings. Five hundred thousand naira dowry. And a strand of pubic hair (yours please!)

LOOOOOOOL!!! She’s working on her next book. I can’t wait!

– Stephanie

 

Ok! I’m jumping into the pool with this one. LOL! Since the blog started and people are getting a hang of what our focus-on-content is all about, we’ve been getting loads of emails on this-and-that. So I’ll take it one by one. Men have been asking: “how do I get a good woman?”

Here are 5 tips that can help…

Get a job:

A busy man is a very attracted kind. When you have a job it gives you a certain kind of confidence that completes your masculinity. As a man, you want to be in control, and financial strength gives you the ability to be in charge. Women do not take jobless men seriously; and having a job doesn’t necessarily mean you are locked up in an office, you could run your own business – no matter how small initially as long as there are prospects of growth, and a healthy sense of ambition.

Be a gentleman:

A gentleman means you do not kiss-and-tell, you do not hit a woman, you do not lose your temper unnecessarily, you do not get drunk, you do not act out your frustration inappropriately. A gentleman walks out of a relationship with the lessons he has learnt and his head held high – he is not vindictive and doesn’t keep a grudge; he attends to the emotions of women with care and consideration. He doesn’t act like a tout or make certain decisions that would harm another person. Nature always honours a man of that kind because they are rare species.

Look good:

Exercise. Lose the tummy fat. Wear cologne. Dress appropriately. Keep your breath fresh. Cut your nails. And smile. You can never go wrong looking suave. Like bees to honey, women will run towards you!

Be spiritual:

Have the covering of God upon your life. There’s just something sublime about a man that knows God. It’s in his eyes, his thoughts, they words that come out from his mouth, his attention to details, the way he attends to crises… there’s a glow to his presence; it’s like a magnet that pulls the right people to him. And with God, he has a discerning spirit to make the right choices out of life. Not that he is perfect, but he is made whole – in God.

Be the Head:

A man who can fix things, solve problems, run his life properly and those in his care shows great maturity and he becomes wanted by women! Learn how to be useful. Men want women who can cook and take charge domestically, and women want men who can fix appliances and make lasting decisions that they (women) can put their trust in! No woman wants a boy who isn’t sure where his next meal is coming from or what the nearest future holds. Women want to submit to men who can direct their path towards a course that leads to promise.

My honest opinion. What else do you think we can add to the list? Let’s hear it!

It’s Kanekalon Salon Storm Season 2! Yay!!! Another amazing Kanekalon experience is about to happen! I’ll be storming your neighbourhood salon tomorrow, Saturday 15^th and Sunday 16^th. It’s going to be great fun plus lots and lots of gifts! I can’t wait! Stay pretty. Kanekalon rocks! See you all!

It’s the Style Cover of the Next Big Thing magazine. Ah! Beautiful memories! Paris was a grand encounter! Love is a wonderful experience!

Above all things, I wish that you would all enjoy the beauty of true love – majestic and all-encompassing!

More pictures from the magazine coming soon…

Fashion is over-rated! We need to understand that our heels, the designer bags, the diamonds, couture wardrobe are just accessories and not who we really are! The obsession with fashion and beauty and the pop culture distract the average Nigerian youth from the core elements that makes a person inspiring. By all means be fashionable but you owe it to yourself, society and to God to be much more than a mannequin. Our values are so twisted! Our students should focus on getting an education, not hustling to get an LV bag. There’s time for everything. And even when that time comes when you can afford all the glitter in the world, fashion will always be the extra benefit – not the main ingredient. First, build substance! Your love for the latest designer this-and-that will not increase your IQ unfortunately. And like Michelle Obama stated some time back, “I don’t want to waste anxiety on something as limited as clothes.” Word!