Stephanie Linus Daily

Tag: Relationships

  • Talk To Steph: Who Should I Marry?

    Hello Stephanie,

    I’m in a very difficult situation now and I hope your readers can help me out.

    I am 28 years-old and I have a boyfriend I have been dating for three years. We met in the University and started dating the year we graduated. The thing is he has been finding it very difficult getting a good job to help him settle down and start a family, but I’ve been very supportive and hoping things will get better for him. He also has some younger siblings that he’s taking care of. However, I recently met an older man who has lived abroad for many years and is ready to marry me. He has way more money than my boyfriend. He has met my parents and although they like my boyfriend, they are getting impatient with him and suggesting I should go for this older man.

    I’m so confused right now. Most of my friends are married or have kids already and I don’t want to get older before I settle down. Should I wait for my boyfriend to get more financially stable and marry me or leave him for this older man who is ready to get married now? – Sharon

    Hello, dearies! What do you advise Sharon to do?

  • What’s the best relationship advice you’ve ever received?

    One thing I find most singles struggling with is the signals they get from people they are dating or have an interest in. We’ve all been there before.

    Here is a common scenario:

    Guy meets girl. Guy initiates conversation. They go out on a few dates and girl starts to ask “what are we doing?” “are we dating?” “are we now a couple?” Guy says “yes, of course we are!”

    But, a few days or weeks later, he starts to pull away. He acts like he’s no longer interested and its so hard to get him on the phone to chat for those long hours like you used to. Dates are now few and far in-between and girl begins to wonder what happened.

    A good friend of mine once told me, “If a person is into you, they’ll move heaven and earth to see you.” And that’s what I’d like to share with single ladies and guys out there. Do not waste your time on a partner who does not recognize your worth. The moment you realize your worth, you shift your energy to attract new people who respect your worth. It starts with you first.

    I hope this resonates with you and that you value yourself more whether single, dating, or married.

    Share with me… what’s the best relationship advice you ever received?

  • Physical Distance Doesn’t Have To Mean Emotional Distance

    For many of us, the COVID-19 crisis has changed our lives and the way we relate with people around us almost overnight.

    We hear this term – social distancing – almost every day as a means of protecting ourselves from getting infected with the virus. But the truth is what we should really practice is physical distancing and not emotionally disentangling ourselves from our friends and loved ones. Yes, we’re keeping the physical distance between us, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still emotionally connect.

    Sickness reminds us that we are all each other’s responsibility, but it can be painfully difficult to know how to enact those responsibilities when the physical distance is first and foremost among them. How do we help people when we need to limit physical contact with them? The answer is simple: Let’s focus on reducing physical contact while maintaining—to the extent possible—the social connections that help us thrive and stay healthy.

    Small steps can lead to big effects.

    Here are some of the ways I’ve been keeping that emotional connection with my loved ones:

    Phone Calls; Video Calls; Text messages; If you live in a place where you’re allowed to go outside, meet up with friends for walks or a run. Just remember to keep about two meters (six feet) between each other and avoid shaking hands.

    Not only can you emotionally connect during this period, you absolutely should! Check-in regularly on family, older parents, neighbors, friends, or relatives and let them know they are loved and valued.

    Amazonians, how have you been connecting with your loved ones emotionally during the pandemic?

  • Forgive Yourself…

    All of us make mistakes at times. As humans, we’re imperfect.

    We’ve all done things we’re not proud of. However, stewing in remorse isn’t a productive way to cope. As difficult as it may seem, letting go of guilt and shame is a necessary part of moving on from any mistake or embarrassment.

    Unfortunately, the decision to feel miserable for the rest of your life can have tragic consequences. And not always in obvious ways. A lot of people struggle with self-condemnation or self-blame because they’ve either done something they feel was wrong and they feel guilty, or because they feel that they’re wrong or defective in some way and they feel a sense of shame. No one can beat us up better than we beat ourselves up.

    When we try to forgive ourselves, we’re trying to release something that feels like it is part of us. We’re releasing who we were in the moment that we did whatever it was.

    It’s time for you to remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can. I would love for you to let go of the burden you might be carrying around so you can learn how to forgive yourself and start to experience some freedom in your life.

    There’s a season for our suffering and regret. We have to have that. But the season ends; the world moves on. And we need to move on with it.

  • Happy Mother’s Day!

    I strongly believe that appreciation for any parent should be every day of the year, but, I still love to celebrate moms on this special day.

    I am so blessed to be one, and I celebrate all the wonderful and selfless mothers out there! With many countries of the world currently on lockdown, the value of mothers is even more appreciated. I have so much respect for the work that all women and moms do each day.

    To those who hope and pray to become mothers, I pray that God grants you your heart’s desire, and to those who have lost children or their own mothers, I pray God gives you the strength and grace to overcome every pain.

    To all moms, stepmoms, godmothers, grandmothers, guardians and women out there, your gift to the world is seen, noticed, and appreciated.

    Happy Mother’s Day!

  • Hot Topic: Would You Marry A 30-Year-Old Man Who Lives With His Mother?

    Hey lovelies,

    A young, unmarried friend of mine approached me with this question some days ago and I wanted to share it here to know what you think.

    Here is the scenario: The lady is in her mid 20’s and ready to settle down. The man is 30, met her at a work-related event and they clicked immediately. They’ve been dating for almost a year, met each other’s friends and are getting ready to take it to the next level by meeting each other’s parents. His father is late and he is an only child, hence, his closeness to his mother. His mother also has some health challenges and he’s been taking care of her since he lost his father 5 years ago. It’s never been an option to leave his mother and he never thought about it until she raised some concerns. According to him, his mother will live with them if they get married and he’s not going to change his mind.

    What would you do if you were in this situation? Would you go on with the relationship and eventually marry him, knowing you would be living with your husband and mother-in-law? What would you advise this lady to do?

    I’ll love to know what you think. Please share your comments below.

  • Make Me Fabulous Season 2 Episode 8 Is Here!!! Watch the FULL Episode

    Hey lovelies! It’s time for some fabulousity!!!

    Today, I have the pleasure of bringing to you the full episode of Make Me Fabulous Season 2, Episode 8. On this episode, we hosted the lovely Temilola & Segun Oduyemi.

    The excitement began right from the moment we picked them up from their home. Temilola’s day was filled with many treats and by the time we were through, she looked so different and stunning!

    I truly enjoyed the heart-to-heart chat I had with them about their marital journey and their time spent on the show. Their vow renewal ceremony was also exceptional. It was such a beautiful and emotional ceremony for the Oduyemi’s. Their words were honest and filled with so much depth as they remembered how far they’d come in this seven-year journey.

    Watch the full episode below!

  • Did You Make A New Friend This Year?

    It’s already October lovelies!

    A few days ago, as we crossed into the last quarter of the year 2019, I began to reflect on the goals I set for myself at the beginning of the year. One of those goals was to make good connections with people, both business and personal, that would have a positive impact on my life.

    Relationships are important. At different stages of my professional journey, people have been instrumental in helping me achieve success or bring life to my dreams. In my personal endeavors, I wouldn’t have come this far without the support of my husband, close family and friends who have supported me every step of the way.

    So, as I reflect on the year 2019, I’m very grateful for the new connections I’ve made with people who have helped make my life more beautiful.

    Tell me about your experience. Did you make a new friend this year?

  • 5 Signs You Should Go On A Second Date

    The first date is always a significant measure of whether an attraction would lead to a relationship or not. It might be awkward at first, but as two people settle into the date and begin chatting, you begin to notice things about the other person that determines whether you want to go on a second date with him or her again.

    Here are 5 signs to make you know whether a first date would lead to a second one:

    1. When they go the whole date with our touching their phone: In this age of smartphones and social media, you find that most people would rather spend time on their phones while on a date than the person in front of them. If you find that your date is very distracted and prefers phone chatting to actually talking with you, this might be a good sign that the person is not really interested in you.
    2. He/she shows signs of respect: Did the person show up 30minutes late? Did he open the doors for you like a gentleman? Did he/she treat the waiter respectfully? The way and manner your date does some of these are signs of the kind of treatment you are going to receive if you do decide to progress into a relationship. Watch out for these signs.
    3. How engaging is the conversation?: You don’t really have to talk about your deepest secrets on a first date, but there has to be a good flow to the conversation. When you talk about yourself, is your date asking questions and engaging you? Or is he/she just smiling and nodding? If you have a good flow and the person has a genuine interest in you, there’s a good chance it might lead to a second date.
    4. You actually enjoy yourself: One of the first signs that you should go on a second date is that you really enjoy the first one. Don’t focus on whether your friend thinks the other person is good for you instead, pay attention to how you feel when you’re with them. If you enjoy yourself, it’s a good sign that you’ll enjoy the second date, as well.
    5. You have a lot in common: Every successful couple will have at least one or two things in common. To determine whether you should take on a second date, talk about your interests and find out if they align. Your date may not have EVERYTHING in common with you, but should at least have enough for you both to have a good balance in the relationship.

  • Stephanie’s Poll: Should A Lady Ask A Man On A Date?

    Hi SL Fabz,

    I’d like to read your honest opinion on this question.

    If a lady really likes a guy and knows he is single, should she go ahead and ask him out on a date? Let’s also imagine that she knows he likes her but might be constrained by some factors unknown to her. Is it proper for a lady to make the first move? Do you think there will be positive or negative consequences if she does so?

    Please share your thoughts in the comments section…